It’s like when you think you know someone and they’re this quiet reserved person. And then you go to a party they’ve thrown and they’re really drunk and half naked, on a table twirling their shirt over their head.
it’s funny how other countries don’t know about our binge-drinking culture and all the teenage pregnancy and jeremy kyle
Beijing:we want lights and precision and a good clean night
London:FORGET IT LETS MAKE IT THE SHIRE AND GET FRANK TURNER! AND LETS MAKE THE WHOLE THING VICTORIAN, BRING LOCKHEART TOO ONLY IF HE HAS A TOP HAT, MUSTN'T FORGET JK ROWLING AND BRING MR BEAN TOO ONLY IF YOU DO A CHARIOT OF FIRE MONTAGE. LETS HAVE A TON OF LIGHTY BEDS AND ABOUT 12 MARY POPPINS, NOW WE MUST MONTAGE BRILLIANT ENGLISH MUSIC AND THROW A SLIGHT TARDIS NOISE TO THROW THE WHOVIANS INTO PANDEMONIUM, ALSO WE MUST QUOTE THE HUNGER GAMES TO TRY AND BRING BACK THE DISTRICTS NOW LETS GET THE QUEEN AND JAMES BOND, OH FORGET IT THROW THEM OUT OF A PLANE, ITS OUR OLYMPICS AND THIS IS WHAT WE SHALL DO WITH IT, YOU KNOW WHY? BECAUSE THIS IS ENGLAND AND WE DO WHAT WE WANT THAT'S WHY
“Honestly, I felt that the inclusion was the perfect nod to the Doctor. Those who know him have all immediately recognized his materialization. But to those who don’t know him, it was merely noise and not enough to warrant further thought. (I mean, all the companions come running from blocks away when the TARDIS lands in a city, yet no one else ever takes notice). Plus, The Doctor has never gone out of his way to grab the limelight. He (mostly) just observes. So I think that was Danny’s way of letting us, those in the know, know that the Doctor was indeed there, and that if he had to step in to stop any threat, then we will never have to know. Because that is the true Doctor, the silent guardian.”—A really nice comment on this article mentioning the TARDIS noise during the Olympic Opening Ceremonies (via notdoingmywork)
“In English,” Professor Austin said, “a double negative forms a positive. However, in some languages, such as Russian, a double negative remains a negative. But there isn’t a single language, not one, in which a double positive can express a negative.”
A voice from the back of the room piped up, “Yeah, right.”
cashier:NO ACTUALLY IT ISN'T OK FOR YOU TO PAY WITH MONOPOLY MONEY JUST BECAUSE I SERVED YOU A PEPSI INSTEAD OF A COKE BECAUSE PEPSI AND COKE ARE BOTH LEGITIMATE ALBEIT SOMEWHAT DIFFERENT VERSIONS OF THE SAME BASIC BEVERAGE. THEY ARE BOTH TASTY AND EQUALLY EDIBLE. MONOPOLY MONEY, HOWEVER, IS NOT OK TO PAY WITH BECAUSE WE HAVE A STANDARDISED LEGAL TENDER IN THIS COUNTRY AND IT IS NOT MONOPOLY MONEY. ANYONE CAN JUST GO TO TOYS R US AND BUY MONOPOLY BUT IF THEY COULD SPEND THE MONEY THEY OBTAINED IN IT EVERYWHERE WHAT WOULD THAT DO TO THE ECONOMY THERE'D BE CHAOS I CAN'T BELIEVE I HAVE TO EXPLAIN THIS TO YOU WERE YOU DROPPED AS A BABY WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU